I used to reside in Pasir Ris near some catholic school high school (my school too at that time). The place is known to be dirty. Basically every night, I ll have nightmares. I didn’t sleep in peace for years till I moved out. I dreamt of satanic stuff like encountering demons and reciting my prayers only for voices to mimic my recital in a mocking manner and shrill laughter.

My bedroom is opposite my kitchen. At night, in the darkness, I can hear heavy breathings coming out from the kitchen toilet. Continuous, loud heavy breathings as though something alive in there. Apparently I wasn’t the only one, all my siblings heard. Non of us dared to go to the toilet at night.

My room wasn’t spared either. I slept in a doubler deck bed with my sibling. Mine was the lower bed. There was this evening I was reading in bed. My sibling’s bed was creaking and creaking, as though she s tossing around. I was pissed off. This stupid idiot cant even sleep properly, I thought in irritation. When it continued, I got out of bed to scold her. To my surprise there was no one there and I was alone in the room!! My heart beat wildly and I ran out.

There was also one occasion when my little brother (very young at that time) told me he saw a pair of legs on the upper deck bed in my room. There was only a pair of legs, no torso, no body, nothing. Daily occurrence of black figures dashing or peering from corners were the norm.

Once during the 7th month, I was sleeping when I heard few knockings on my window. It was late at night and I was paralyzed with fear. Woke mom up and she told me to sleep in her room. Days after mom dreamt there was a lady in white lurking around the corridors of our house. Not sure if its related to the knockings.

Growing up there as a teenager, I was filled with anger and hatred. Not sure what causes it. I screamed and fight constantly. Sometimes the hatred and anger in me got too much to bear, I sat down in front of mirror n cut my hair non stop with a scissors almost semi conscious of what I was doing. Ok end of part one. Hahahahaa… my fingers need a break, apparently I’m using one of those old keyboards, that’s kinda hard to type on n I need to really press each letter hard because it tends to be stuck!

Mom realized I was really getting out of hand. The tantrums, the outburst, the reckless way I hit my siblings if we quarreled. One day she asked me out to tamp mall to shop. I readily agreed. On the way I realized something was wrong because the route is not heading towards tamp mall! Actual fact she brought me to this uncle’s house, he’s like a medium. I felt so damn angry beyond words, its like freaking betrayal to me! I don’t even wanna look at mom’s face, suddenly I hate her so much.

The man asked me to untie my hair and let my hair down. He asked me to sit down and he used a key and push it under my nails. Holy crap, its HURTS LIKE MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!

He keep on asking me whether its painful and I was reminded of the betrayal and my ego stopped me from admitting. He did it to all my finger n toe nails. OMG the pain is excruciating!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS PAINFUL LIKE HELL!!!!!!!!! I badly wanna scream right there and then!!! Then its like he took something invisible out from my feet and threw it away out of the window.

Suddenly sense of betrayal, hate and anger are all GONE. For the first time in my life, I experienced PEACE. I can still remember the feeling till now because it was so new to me. My heavy heart lifted. I feel light all of a sudden. I don’t feel angry nor was there the slightest bit of resentment. I felt like a new person who can breathe again and finally I know life is not a dark place. Imagine years and years of darkness and for the first time I saw light. I was actually grateful to mom after that.